The Psalms

It’s funny the power of music. I find when I listen to music I am able to pay attention 5x what I could normally do. Maybe it’s ADD…idk but if I’m reading a book and listening to music I am able to completely place music in background while reading the book and making a mental image of the players. It’s so vivid that when you see a movie like Harry Potter for the first time you feel like you have already seen it. You match the faces to the people and you now associate them with your recollection. You have read the book so you know the ending. You place the actor with the character and before the movie is over you already have their ending imaged. In a sense you are re-watching the same movie over again even though you haven’t yet. Your focus is at a certain level. We are constantly thinking of everything and processing every rock…color….object…you slow it way down before you start seeing the big picture of each moment. Insead of doing the same song and dance move over and over. You don’t even realize what parts are used to do it. It becomes natural and you start implementing or hitting joystick button to perform that action.

Why do we need change? Without change you are alone. Your one real mind has never had to deal with trivial things. Your growing up on a farm. Very low versed in city-wide problems. Is that just because that’s not me? Whatever we use as our performance…without feeling and getting taken back. Why is this person acting this way? Why are they making me feel this new different way? Our brain doesn’t start to hiccup until you throw something new at it. Then it sets a new parameter for that event. If they showed me real sadness for what I said or did. I have feelings for them so I am forced to associate this scenario with my life. I stop what I’m doing. I’m on auto-pilot and this sets me off-track. I start thinking about what I saw or listened to. Actually gathering my thoughts and thinking about it. Your system one is off and you are only in system two. This is truly system two. What part of the system do you work on when on cocaine?

Emotions last longer. You process the motion that makes you feel some sort of way about it and you start extending your focus towards that action. You think long and hard on it. A normal person you talk to you could care less of their movements and facial expressions. It’s not until we see anger (for example) for an extended time in real life that we react to it. Then you are prone to seeing the emotion the more you look for that expression. Like when you carelessly throw a basketball but make the shot. You become surprised. You try to make it again and you miss because your focusing to much. When you were just doing it you made it. You need to really focus on the contents you put it in your personality. You do not regain this focus until something new comes along.

Auto-pilot = Good. You know what you need accomplished and are able to do that. You focus to much and you make mistakes but you need to focus to put yourself in auto-pilot mode…to have muscle memory you do something over and over and over…it becomes your auto-pilot. When you are in the pool and you start thinking about your stroke and your breath you end up slowing down and achieving poorer results. When you stop thinking about it you become a star again. So it takes focus to make something an auto-pilot feature but when you add more focus to that you end up declining in your attribute. Where is the happy medium? When time comes what do you care about? The sides and ends are covered and the middle a little but not perfect. You are making a puzzle and starting with the edges and moving inward. Or do you not care about edges and focus on whats in the middle of the puzzle and work your away outwards. What do you think is more important? Who/what/when/where/why decides how we solve the puzzle?

We can knock ourselves in and out of focus. By leg shaking we can adjust comprehension speed. Faster we shake the more you comprehend. Is it serious or not so serious? Interactions before and following an act. When your focusing on that one thing and everyone else goes blurry. You fight not to look at certain things. Constant battle to fight that temptation. You see someone walking by and you want to check them out but you tell yourself no….that’s not right or there is some moral code that makes it not okay. What about the people who don’t even have that knowledge? Do they need repetition to gather it like earning a badge. Your the ultimate decider in if you like the idea or not. Your normal movement and motion in that situation. Then you add conditions. Look all the time. Look only with these people. Do not look with this person. What are the consequences? If I look around her will she be mad at me? If I look around her sister will her sister narc on me? What if I don’t even care? Does that mean I don’t care enough about her?

Do babies have that feeling when your offered something used like a sandwich and you place less value on it. Compared to if they saw you make the sandwich and give it straight to them. Are they able to feel that? The idea that you are giving them a hand-me-down that someone else declined or didn’t need anymore. It this feeling something that we need to notice for ourselves. Are we born with judgement or do we need outside sources to put value on objects/people. If we moved babies into labs and had them subject to only certain content. Would they still act the same way had they been with other people who have the opportunity to influence them. Think of third world countries and how they get little kids recruited. At that point in there life they are so innocent. They can believe and follow hatred without thinking twice of it.

In a nutshell your focus becomes auto-pilot once you decide you are done. If you know how to shoot a basketball and it sometimes goes in that may be satisfactory for you. The idea of changing the way you shoot or how you release the ball becomes null and void because your content. You no longer wish to pursue it. Life is all about earning those boy/girl scout badges. We shouldn’t limit ourselves with a handful for our collection. We need to get them all (Pokemon style). When your close to capturing them all you can be the creator and make new ones that you need to aspire to obtain. Constantly pushing yourself to accomplish more but without your drive to keep increasing you will fall short. You need to keep yourself away from the top of mountain. When do you finally allow yourself to reach the top? Does death secure this for you? Some people believe in reincarnation. They stop challenging themselves and are okay because they believe in this ideology they get a second chance. They believe if they are good they will come back as something cooler/better/more fun. If they are bad they will come back as something small/unimportant.

Why not spend energy living in present. Making your current situation as good as it can be. Training yourself and increasing your attributes. Who cares if we reincarnate? Will we become better people if we do? Will our weaknesses become strengths and our strengths remain unhinged. Will we continue being lazy and settle? In the nutshell our job is to keep moving. Make our life more auto-processed or is this the problem? We move everything once we feel it’s done. In order to perfect something we need to give it more time. We need to keep focusing and fucking up our shot. Tiger Woods can be considered the greatest golfer of all-time. He kept adjusting his swing year after year. He would re-frame it and I wonder if this affected his longevity? Did it prolong his career or help shorten it? What if he had given up on changing his swing and just kept moving forward with his skill set unadulterated. Once he had his car incident he accepted his fate. Instead of fighting he was tired of all the adjustments. His lies or dark life finally caught up to him. He was working at 2x speed of average folk for longest time. It wasn’t doable for long term. He needed a break and once he accepted the break he stopped winning.

So focusing on auto-pilot makes you do worse. Without focus you wouldn’t change anything. You would keep swinging as you always did. You accept fate and non-adjustment. To be great you need to be constantly thinking and adjusting. We do not like this in-between area of being uncomfortable. We do not like change. We learn how to ride a bike and once we perfect it…we don’t think about it. Outside forces are removing one of our tires and telling us…learn how to ride it now. Is it worth it? Do we care enough to try and practice and be able to ride again? Do we just take the out and go get a different bike that has both wheels? There is no happy medium. Say you are performing a lay-up. You have made this shot a thousand times. You want to do a reverse lay-up. You will be adjusting your regular idea of a layup to create a similar process. Some people choose to do this at practice or when it doesn’t matter. It allows them to hone the skill. Some people will go out during a game and try this move. They know they can epicly fail but if they don’t do it they may not ever try it in a game. Say they practiced it over and over and weren’t able to get it done efficiently. If there was an opening in the game where that move would be their best bet at scoring they would not take it. Their past failures when it didn’t matter affected their actions when it did. Is it better to have risked everything and just did it or to have carefully planned it out and then used it? Like in a football game…you could have a killer sneak play. Once you use it and people see it…it’s not sneak anymore. They will remember what you did and keep that on the back burner for future plays. Is it better to keep filling their minds with plays you may never use again. It allows you to continue to be ahead of them. While they are thinking of your past moves you can keep surprising them with new shit. At other times you have someone who keeps slamming the same thing down your throat because you have no answer for it. Like Shaq…who could stop him? What did they do? Hack-a-Shaq. His one weakness that not only worked great but affected his mindset. Instead of finger-banging people all day every day he had to take a step-back and re-evaluate. He was getting put on the defensive. He wasn’t in control anymore. Which is better?

Who decides when it matters. Some people are always thinking everything they say or do matters. They are worried about how others will respond to them. They are not living for themselves.

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